Dragonball: Battle of Gods (2014)

As in every DBZ feature, the Earth is either threatened or under attack and Goku sets out to save us. This time, our villain is Beerus, the God of Destruction. Awakened from a 39yr slumber, he seeks out a fight with a Super Sayan God. Not finding a worthy challenge among the remaining Sayans, and after defeating ALL of the Z-Fighters, he decides to destroy Earth. Goku, champion fighter and savior of Earth, learns that in order to have the strength to challenge pyrrus he must become a god himself. 

Goku vs Beerus is one of the best fights they have animated. Not because of the action, but because of the story development. Goku's been humbled by a stronger fighter and realizes that he cannot win without using power borrowed from his friends, and he hates every minute, lamenting that the God form is something that he'll never be able to achieve on his own. He's vulnerable. I can't remember the last time that's happened.
Anyway, I had been looking forward to watching this flick ever since it was announced and admittedly, I could be biased by nostalgia, but I feel that Battle of Gods Lived up to its hype. I thoroughly enjoyed all of it. The humor, the fights all the references and cameos. All of it. It also summed up the events of Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z so that new viewers could jump right into this story.

Violence? Yes
Explosions? Yes
Nudity? No

Who's on first?...making copies...

Hey, do you know how to turn on the Xerox?


The Xerox copier.

Yes. Which one?

I powered it down to clear some job, but I can't turn it back on.

I don't know which Xerox though.

The Xerox. It's around here *points*

Sigh. Okay, I'll just follow you.


I work with winners.

One Phone, Two Phone. Old Phone, New Phone.

So, they hired an Office Manager, (let's call her Layla) and since they hadn't decided on a place for her to sit, she sat at the Reception desk. (Later we learned that that would be where the office manager would sit from then on, but that's another story.)

At the reception desk, there is a console phone. Console phones are better known as reception phones and they can hold somewhere between 30 and 40 lines. Because no one knows how things actually work, and because Layla refused to use it, they set up a separate 16 button handset beside the console. Her logic being, "I'm not a receptionist, and I won't be answering the phones like one."

Here's why I'm writing this story, every call that has come in to that phone, she has answered and transferred to the appropriate person. So now there are two phones on that desk that serve the same purpose, all because she refuses to learn how to use them and or the company refuses to do away with tradition.

Update:  The new Office Manager has spearheaded a campaign to get rid of the traditional phone and use the smaller handset. Partly because she doesn't want to use it and learn how, partly because it just takes up space on the desk.

You Can't Choose Your Parents...

So I was on the train the other day…

…and I hear this woman yelling. She’s screaming at someone telling them to “Shut the fuck up” and something along the lines of “Who do you think you are?” I had the music going so I didn’t notice at first, but when I heard, “I’ll fuck you up” along with more screaming, I turned to see who she could be yelling at and it turned out to be a little boy. Seriously, a small child who could not have been older than 5. She continued laying into this child without mercy and at one point, she even called him an asshole and made sure that he was aware that it was she who was the parent, and not him.

Honestly, it was crazy, and by the time the whole scene had ended, one man summed up the event with a shrug and said, “Some people just shouldn’t be parents.”

It is kinda hard to disagree with that.

You Don't Know Crack

So I was on the train the other day...

...and a homeless man got on and began asking for change. Two men were talking and when one of the guys saw the hobo, they had the following conversation:

Man #1: "Man, I would never give that man money. He's a crackhead."
Man #2: "How do you know that?"
Man #1: I saw him coming out of a Crack House the other day
Man #2: How do you know it was a Crack House?
Man #1: ...(Silence)

That's exactly what I was thinking..."How do you know it was a Crack House? and why aren't you answering?"

Rampage: Capital Punishment (2014)

A man takes over a TV station and holds a number of hostages as a political platform to awaken humanity, instead of money.

The Cast:
  • Little Bill Williamson
  • Ted from Hey Dude
  • The Best Damn News Team Ever
  • Inept cops
  • Civilian Canon fodder

The Situation:

3 years after the events of the first film, Bill Williamson has returned, this time taking control of a local news station in the next stage of his anarchist agenda. He basically wants to Purge the 1% and is imploring people to help him rid the world of the corrupt rich and save the world. 

Sandwiched in between is his slaughter if the 99% which basically amounts to population control.

The Resolution:

People are killed, stuff is blown up and the highly implausible adventures of Little Billy Williamson continue.

Line of the film: "What I've done in the past and what I'm doing today, is because there is no gun control."
I can't decide I whether that line is funny or sad, but it rings true either way. 

You've probably never heard of either, but if you're in the mood for a popcorn flick that's just randomly destructive, look no further. The Rampage Series is what postal should have been, --someone going crazy and shooting things-- but it's better as it's own film. Specifically, what sets it apart are the high production values and the obscene amount of destruction caused by one man. In the first film, dude nearly layed waste to an entire town. Capital Punishment, though, is a lot more talky than the first but the story is roughly the same.

Violence? Yes
Explosions? Yes
Nudity? No


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