Sprayed and Neutered

So I was on the train the other day...

...And I'm riding home after having drinks with friends, when a drunk guy gets on. He pulls out a beer and let's everyone know he's in a good mood and celebrating. When he pops the top, the beer sprays and accidentally hits another passenger. He immediately apologizes, produces a napkin and motions to clean it off for him. The guy refuses and tells him that its okay, and to "just leave it." So he puts that beer down, and pulls out another. This time opening it slowly just in case. After he finishes that beer, he reaches down to pick up the one that exploded earlier. He asks another passenger, (a big dude with a red cap) "is this yours?" and gets sharply rebuffed. "You know that's not mine. Why are you asking me stupid questions?!"The drunk dude replies, "Sorry brother. Just checking," and goes about his business.

Maybe 10 minutes later, a "performer" gets on the train and announces he's gonna sing for us. Dude is terrible, and without hesitation, the big dude begins to boo him. The guy finishes and says, "Don't hate" to which big dude responds, "That's not hate. You suck! Booo!" The drunk dude then chimes in with, "Yeah, you're terrible," And tries to give the big dude a fist bump. Big dude says, "Man, get the fuck away from me! Why are you talking to me? You don't know me and I don't know you. Let's just leave it at that!"

Surprisingly, this actually hurts the drunk dude's feelings. He says to big dude, very glumly, "You're right. I'm sorry I got in your face. But you didn't have to yell at me like that. You didn't have to say it like that" and he returned to his seat and slumped down for the rest of his ride. After he left, the big dude said to me, "You see this foolishness? He's lucky I didn't just punch him in his face!" I agreed. Partly because it was true, and partly b/c I didn't want to get punched in the face. [or worse, end up on WorldStar]

Sometimes it's best to just smile and nod.