A Company Man (2013)

 

Hyeong Do, an assassin who look just like a company worker. He wants to stop but things doesn't go easy like he thought.

I put off this movie for a while. Can't say why. It sounded good, but I was just never in the mood for it.

The Cast: 

• A dedicated hitman who is a rising star in his company of secret assassins.
• Middle Management
• The rest of the company

The Situation:

Losing interest in his work, a top hitman makes a few career altering decisions, (finding love, leaving people alive, etc.) that can't go ignored in his industry. And they don't due to his meddling middle manager who has had it in for our hero since his star had begun to rise.

A Company Man was a pretty good film overall. A lot of action, a lot of gun fights and unfortunately drama. But in reality, the story is about a conflicted hitman who is losing his zeal for the job, so you kinda have to expect drama. In exchange for putting up with that however, the climactic scene sees a pissed off Hyeong Do return to the company and engage in  gun battles with all the current employees as he makes his way to his former boss. 

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? No

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Killer Girl K (2011) [TV Series]

After her mother is kidnapped and killed, a young woman who was (already quite bad ass) joins a shadowy group to get the revenge training she needs. When she eventually accomplishes that task, she wants to retire. But to do so she'll have to fight her way out of the company.


Killer Girl K/Little Girl K is an action filled Korean series. It doesn't break new ground, but it does look good and the fight scenes are well done.

             

Sexy. Bad Ass. Women. They even did an their own stunts.

Here's a fight scene that I think you'll enjoy. Decide for yourself if it's worth checking out or not:

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? Yes

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Headshot (2012)

A cop who becomes a hitman for a group aimed at eliminating those who are above the law finds his world turned upside down by a single a devastating blow.

During a contract kill, an assassin,Tul, is shot in the head. His best friend manages to get him to a hospital and he barely makes it. Three months later he awakes, only to find that his vision has gone upside down.

We soon get Tul's backstory and see how he came to be this way.

Tul was a policeman who busted open a case implicating the Minister's brother and refuses a 10 Million Baht sum to back away. He then super coincidentally meets a sexy prostitute named Joy and gives her the business, only to find her dead in the bathtub the next morning. This of course lead to blackmail, to which he responded by nailing the dude with a steel chair. WWE style. That resulted in prison time, which effectively removed him from the case anyway.

In prison he was visited by Dr Demon, who offers him freedom in exchange for becoming one of his assassins. Basically killing high ranking corrupt officials who've escaped legal action. He accepts of course.

Back in the present, Tul is captured and tortured into giving up whoever gives him orders. They strip him and drip hot candle wax on his junk then shove the candle itself into his junk. (they waxed Santa's balls!) He manages to escape but he knows he needs a driver so he hijacks the car of the 2nd hottest Asian in the film. He tells her that he tires of his life and seeks out a life of peace and tranquility with the monks of the island. But that's soon shattered as men come looking to kill him for past transgressions.

Headshot jumps back and forth in narrative a bit too seamlessly. You have to really focus to tell when is when. Outside of that, it was a pretty good film.

Out of Ten? 7 

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? Yes

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Pulp Fiction (1997)

The lives of two mob hit men, a boxer, a gangster's wife, and a pair of diner bandits intertwine in four tales of violence and redemption.

I'm not going to review this film because everyone has seen it by now. I just needed to put it on the blog.

The only real question I have concerning this film is: Whatever happened to Ving Rhames?
All of the characters from this film can be found today except him:

• Travolta is "not" a gay scientologist
• Sam Jackson is Sam Jackson (and arguably moreso as he gets older.)
• Bruce Willis appears in a lot of shit randomly. (Seriously.)
• Uma Thurman is hot and still semi-relevant. 
• Christopher Walken still finds work.

What the fuck happened to Ving?

Even Matthew Maconalamalamalama has found other roles to take his shirt off in. But Ving? He's all but disappeared. Weird.

There's a solid soundtrack somewhere in there that I can't argue with, and I'm also fairly certain that Tarantino wrote and acted in the role he did solely because he wanted say "nigger" a few times and get away with it.

So, quotes and stills?
Nah. Better. Internet quotes and stills:

 

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Killer Joe (2012)

When a debt puts a young man's life in danger, he turns to putting a hit out on his evil mother in order to collect the insurance.

Owing a debt of $6K to the local town mobster, Chris hears from a friend about Killer Joe. A Texas police detective, who moonlights as a hired assassin. He hires him to kill his mother so that he can collect on the $50K in insurance money. When it comes to light that he can't pay, Joe decides to takes his sister, Dottie, as collateral and holds his entire family responsible. When Chris attempts to wrestle control from Joe, things reach a hectic and climactic end that changes the lives of all involved.


Killer Joe is a slow burn thriller that is basically what you'd expect from a movie about a guy in debt who acquires more debt by hiring an assassin. The movie moved fairly quick as a whole and the story was easy to follow. I am not a fan of the ending, but that's left to interpretation. I can say that shit did get real.

Matthew McMissingshirt, put in a solid performance as Joe. He was creepy, forceful, unhinged, restrained, yet calm, cool and collected all at the same time. Don't get me wrong, there were good performances all around, but his just stood out to me more because I don't like him. But I give credit where it's due, and Killer Joe has to be one of his best roles.

Out of Ten? 7

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No.
Nudity? Yes

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The Double (2011)

A retired CIA operative is paired with a young FBI agent to unravel the mystery of a senator's murder, with all signs pointing to a Soviet assassin.

Richard Gere is a retired spy who is tasked with working with a young hotshot analyst when a Senator is killed and a foe long thought dead is blamed. He refuses to believe he's alive as it's been 20years since his last activity, but when he's dared to prove it, he agrees to take the case. His target is Cassius. A highly trained very deadly Russian assassin who Topher's character is obsessed with, and has made it his life's work to capture and kill if necessary. Cassius Is aware of this but doesn't believe that he is a threat. If and when he does, he'll attempt to kill him.

There's a twist that's revealed pretty early in the film and Cassius continues to tie up his loose ends as the agents and topher grace specifically, closes in on him. As the hunt continues, they find that several high ranking soviet assassins have come into the states. They may have ties to Cassius so they set out to bring them down. Right as everything is revealed, and a climax is achieved, a double twist occurs, followed immediately by yet another. That's right folks, a triple twist!

The film is clunky, but by the end it begins to make sense. Richard gere and topher grace deliver admirable performances, and Martin Sheen brings levity for the 5 minutes he's in the film. I was waiting for the world record fourth twist, but surprisingly that never came.

Out of Ten? 6

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? No

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Ninja (2009)

A westerner named Casey, studying Ninjutsu in Japan, is asked by the Sensei to return to New York to protect the legendary Yoroi Bitsu, an armored chest that contains the weapons of the last Koga Ninja.

The top two students in the running to replace the leader of the dojo don't like each other two much. During a heated training exercise, the Japan born student tries to kill the Last Samurai and is expelled from the school.Years later, he shows up as a Snake Eyes clone, conducting mercenary work, specifically assassinations for an unnamed secret organization.

The dojo throws a small ceremony to name his successor and pass down the ancient weaponry. My question is, if the techniques are to be passed down in secret, why have a public ceremony? Anyway, Snake eyes crashes the party and after being reminded of his expulsion, he threatens the Sensei and everyone there that day. As the ninja weapons are being hidden, snake eyes is preparing for war. He has a closet full of weapons and at nightfall, he makes his move, taking out nearly the whole school on his way to kill his former teacher. The old man is dope. he even gets in a "I taught you everything you know," but like a good ninja, snake eyes resorts to chicanery to win, using poison darts then decapitation to end the battle.

After giving away her location by calling her father, snake eyes sees the number and deduces that the weapons are in New York. He calls the leader of the secret society to bring in the ninja girl and makes plans of his own to join them shortly. After being attacked, the ninja kids are on the run. This eventually leads to a fight on the train, which not only had to be the longest ride, but it also gave me a new kill to add to the list (skip to 5:15 for the kill)

Sidenote: I don't get how she is the daughter of the head of the ninja school, yet a complete punk bitch during fight scenes. I thought these mofos were ninjas. A little gunfire and she turned into a quivering bitch. She was dead weight throughout the film. Useless. it's like they watered down her character during filming.

After finally getting arrested, the (cliched) stubborn cops believe they are the bad guys and treat them like so. Chaining them to chairs and blatantly disregarding their stories. Snake Eyes shows up at the station and the cops eat sword for their efforts. Nifty little lightsaber effect on his sword too, but that just added insult to injury. After a battle atop the police station, we quickly learn that the last samurai is no match for Snake Eyes, who captures Ninja Girl and flees. The Last Samurai is now on a mission to rescue Ninja Girl. Tearing through the secret society along the way, he gets in contact with snake eyes and offers to trade the ninja weapons for the girl. Making his way to the deal, last samurai puts on the ancient weaponry and finally claims his birthright as an American Ninja. Which of course leads to the final fight scene and the downfall of Snake Eyes.

I came into this film expecting total crap. What I got was decent crap. Passable, but still crap. The dialogue was bad but who needs words when you can let spin kicks speak for you? (Seriously. I think his dialogue was 80% spin kicks. I don't think I saw dude throw a punch the whole film!), the logic behind the plot was flawed, and somehow a police helicopter was written into and out of the movie during the same scene. Outside of all that, the evil ninja was, of course, a total badass and the action scenes (read: bloodshed) saved the film from a worse score.

Out of Ten? 6

Violence? Yes
Explosions? Smoke Bombs.
Nudity? No. Unfortunately

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Assassination Games (2011)

The indestructible Jean-Claude Van Damme returns to big-screen mayhem in this light-'em-up action thriller, with rival assassins joining forces to dismantle a global drug cartel operating in league with the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency.

In order to head off a government scandal, two officials try to take out the only agent who can incriminate them. Their plan is to kill Flint, the only agent who can identify them. In doing so, Interpol releases Polo, a criminal with ties to Flint, on the hopes that he will come out of hiding and try to eliminate him. When he does, complications arise when Van Damme gets wind of Polo's release and sets out to collect the bounty for himself.

The film starts to drag a bit when the love interest(s) comes into play especially when they lay the guilt trip on them about their profession and cause them to soften and rethink their lives. Bleh. But ultimately they are used as motivation, so we're rid of them fairly quickly. Also, it was shot in some sort of sepia tone. I don't know what that was about and I found it kinda weird.

Anyway, I am digging this darker van damme. As a badass assassin, he's waaaay less cheesy and actually seems a bit intimidating. (minus that knot on his forehead.) Scott "Ninja" Adkins is the assassin and government target Flint, and I must admit, I was very impressed with his performance.

It's just so...there.

Out of Ten? 6.5

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? Yes

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The Killing Jar - 2010

A stranger armed with a shotgun takes seven patrons hostage in a remote roadside diner. But as the body count increases, the desperate survivors discover that one of the hostages may be even more dangerous than their captor.

Diners in a small gas stop diner learn of a murder in another county. After a suspicious looking man walks in, they (naturally) assume he is the killer and interrogate him. Soon after, he pops the trunk and shotguns some people to death. Figuring that the killer is already in the diner, he takes a few unlucky patrons hostage until he discovers who the killer is.

Hey hey look!  Jake Busey!  (pic)

The Killing Jar is one of those, "Somebody in here is the killer but it ain't me." movies. and one thing I've learned from this flick: if you're ever in a rural diner and some vicious looking dude rolls in, either leave or leave him be.

The cover had machete, danny trejo in what looked to be a staring role. That was one of the reasons I watched this dreck. At best, this was a Machete cameo. Dude was in the film for like 10 min. He had like 3 lines and he was taken out by a shotgun blast! Dude was at his 2nd most un-machete-ist. (Harold and Kumar 3D is #1)

Another thing I noticed, Michael Madsen is old. This film makes that apparent. Yes dude still has appears to be a tough guy, but I'm convinced dude has no teeth. How tough can you be with no teeth?

Oh, right. Shotgun. That's how...

Stray Quotage:

-"You've got to separate the weak, from the chaff"
      What does that mean?
"Idk. I read it in a book somewhere about people who don't understand the situation that they're in."

-"You're not afraid to die?"
     No, but I am afraid you're going to keep talking.

-"What about you college boy?"
       I'm no killer...I'm an artist
"Hahaha, I ought to just kill you first"

-Everybody's special. A unique, individual, beautiful snowflake.
    "That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard"

Out of Ten? 5.5 

By the end, the Waitress gets a badass moment and shotguns are always worth an extra half point.

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? Nope

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Killer Elite - (2011)

 

 Based on a true story, Killer Elite pits two of the worlds' most elite operatives - Danny, an ex-special ops agent (Jason Statham) and Hunter, his longtime mentor (Robert De Niro) - against the cunning leader of a secret military society ('Clive Owen'). Covering the globe from Australia to Paris, London and the Middle East, Danny and Hunter are plunged into a highly dangerous game of cat and mouse - where the predators become the prey.

After taking a bullet during a mission in Mexico, the Stath swears off Mercenary work. He soon receives a package in the mail with a plane ticket and an Al Queda-like picture of a captured Deniro. He has six months to kill the men who killed a wealthy sheikh's children. Turns out those men were British S.A.S. A Highly elite, well trained branch of the British Armed Forces.  Along the way, he eventually runs afoul of the Pornstache who is assigned to kill him and protect the S.A.S. After a botched assassination, Stath pulls the plug, but when one of his friends it's kidnapped and killed, he has a face to face with Pornstache where they have the tough guy talk and reaffirm each others toughness.

Doesn't he just look...rapey?

The Stath vs. The Stache picks up once it's revealed that they were both being double crossed by their handlers. Stath wants to finish his mission so he can be left alone, 'Stache just wants to kill Stath. By the end though, the Stath walks away from the mercenary life. The 'Stache says he may show up to finish their battle, and the Stath says, "I'll be ready."


Killer Elite is actually kinda, boring.
When they aren't fighting or shooting, the movie is quite slow. When Owen and Statham actually faced off, The Stath was busy getting his ass handed to him. Apparently mustaches really do make one better at hand to hand combat. How much better? The Stath had to resort to a nutshot to win.

 A Fuckin' Nutshot?! Shit, This 'Stache whips ass.

Outside of that, I lost interest in this film pretty early. Was just going through the motions until the end, but Yvonne Strahotsky offers one of the few redeeming qualities of this film. She's just relegated to an eye candy role, but that works as she didn't have much to say anyway.

Ladies, surprisingly, there aren't any shirtless scenes, but there is a wifebeater.

Fellas:
Yvonne Strahovsky:

Umm, listen, I'm going wrap this up. Something's suddenly come up...

Out of Ten? 6

Although I like the idea of  Deniro as a gun toting mercenary, I'm definitely turned off by Clive Owens porn 'stache.


Violence? Yes
Explosions? Probably. I stopped paying attention after a while
Nudity? No.

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