Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters (2013)

***An iCheck Movies Listed Film***

I greatly enjoyed the first film. I'm curious as to where they go in this one.

It's a new year at camp half blood and despite saving Olympus on the last film, Percy can't get over the hump of being a one quest chump. 

After the camp is attacked, he learns that he is part of a, grand prophecy, and he will either save or destroy Olympus when the time comes. But he must first seek the Golden Fleece, and heal the tree that provides the barrier of protection for the camp.

Luke, his nemesis from the first film, has turned a few of the other Demi-God's to his cause and he again seeks to bring about the fall of Olympus. He needs the Golden Fleece in order to revive Kronos, King of the Titans who has the power to destroy Zeus and all the Olympians.

Their paths cross in the Sea of Monsters, where the fleece resides and the fate of the world hangs in the balance.

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I said it before and I'll say it again, I like Greek mythology. Percy Jackson is a dope series. I haven't read the books and I don't intend to, but the movies are consistently entertaining. The concept is awesome (ancient Greek mythology in the modern world), the special effects are dope and the comedy elements from the first are carried over into the film (although they've been noticeably played down in favor of Percy's battle against self-doubt.)

If you watched and enjoyed the first, you'll like the second. Sea of Monsters is the second film in the series, but you don't have to watch The Lightning Thief to understand/enjoy it.

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Stray Quotage:

"It's the chariot of the damned.
         It looks like a NYC taxi.
Same difference"

"I'd be hurt if I wasn't such a self confident individual"

"I had to crawl through the depths of Tartarus itself...and Cleveland"

Violence? Ancient Greek Self defense
Explosions? Yes
Nudity? No

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Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (2010)

Zeus is pissed that someone has stolen his lightning bolt. Since the brothers cannot steal each other's powers, he automatically believes that Poseidons son is the culprit. He gives Poseidon 14 days to return it, or he will declare war.

Percy Jackson is what he believes to be a normal high school teen who happens to suffer from dyslexia. He lives with his mom and deadbeat stepfather in an apartment in NYC.

Everything changes for him on a museum field trip. His teacher changes into a fury, his best friend is revealed as a guardian, and the tour guide was a keeper of a huge secret. Turns out that even his mother is in it. When they finally break it down for him, his mother reveals that he is a demigod. The son of Poseidon and a mortal.

Although he vehemently denies it, Everyone is after him because they have been led to believe that he has stolen Zeus' bolt. Hades kidnaps his mother and holds her for ransom. He intends to use the bolt to break out of his prison and rule Olympus. Percy basically decides "fuck that, I don't have the bolt anyway" and sets out to gain entry to hell to retrieve his mom. Along the way, he grows into his abilities, finds the bolt, the true culprit and reconciles with Poseidon. 

Sean Bean as an immortal? Unfathomable.

How did I miss this movie? The Lightning Thief is a pretty darn good movie. The visual effects are dope and the comedy breaks up the ridiculousness. I'm digging how they've taken Greek Mythology and blended it with present day society. (Olympus is accessed from the empire state building, the entrance to Hades is in Hollywood California, etc) and there's a fucking Minotaur.

What I didn't like was how they had about 10 days to find the bolt and 

1) Percy really didn't give a fuck about that. He was only in it to save his mom. (It basically landed in his lap)
2) they drove from NY to CA (with a stop inbetween in TN) and still had enough time left to lose 5 days in a drug induced haze.

Ridiculous.

Then they stole a Maserati (the logo is a trident) and Rosario Dawson showed up in a corset and I just about forgot my whole damn argument. 

 Oh. My. Zeus.

Check out the noticeables in the rest of the cast list: 

Brandon T. Jackson 
Sean Bean [Immortal]
Kevin McKidd [Rome!!!]
Steve Coogan [Rock Me Sexy Jesus!]
Melina Kanakaredes
Uma Thurman [The Bride]
Pierce Brosnan [The Bond]
Catherine Keener

Joe Pantoliano [Matrix!!!]

And no one mailed in their performance. Uma Thurman killed it as Medusa. 

Fuck it, I'm a sucker for Greek Mythology. Percy Jackson is the shit. 

Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? No

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Clash of the Titans 3D (2011)

Born of a god but raised as a man, Perseus volunteers to lead a daring band of warriors to defeat Hades before he can seize powerfrom Zeus and unleash hell on earth.

Long before man, there was a war between the immortal beings who walked the Earth. After defeating the Titans, Zeus takes his place as the King of Heaven, Poseidon becomes ruler of the oceans and Hades is tricked into becoming the ruler of the underworld. Zeus then created man and their prayers feed their immortality. Lately though, the mortals have been openly rebelling. They feel that the time of the gods has passed and they are willing to wage war to claim power. Feeling forsaken by the very humans he's created, Zeus dispatches Hades to remind the mortals of their role. As Hades attacks a royal court for their disobedience, he reveals the Zeus' plan (obey or die) and lets it be known that Perseus is the son of Zeus.

Now aware of his past, he is told his history that he was basically born to kill the kraken. His intention is to kill Hades, but he has until the next solar eclipse to save the town from the Kraken who will only stop after the princess is sacrificed.

Zeus! We hardly recognized you without that shiny suit.

Clash 3D is an overall decent film. It really tries to flesh out the story, but I found the ending to be rather anti-climactic. There was a lot of build, but no actual delivery. Also, There is no real advantage to watching this in 3D as opposed to the regular D.


In the battle of Greek Mythology films, I would recommend Immortals before this one.

 Fun Fact: The dude that plays Apollo in this film, is Zeus in Immortals. He also killed Apollo in that film. So by the transitive property of Greek Mythology, he's killed himself.

Out of Ten? 6.5

Violence? Yes
Explosions? Yes
Nudity? No

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Immortals (2011)

In Ancient Greece, King Hyperion searches for a powerful weapon that will free the bloodthirsty Titans and enable them to overpower the gods and enslave mankind. Unable to interfere directly, the gods choose a champion to defend them.

According to legend, Immortal beings were once at war with each other. The winners of the war dubbed themselves Gods and took their place above the clouds. The losers were called Titans and were sealed at the bottom of Mt. Tartarus. Lost in the battle was an ancient and powerful weapon, the Epirus Bow. King Hyperion seeks to release the Titans and retrieve the bow in order to rule all of the lands. Theseus is destined to stop him.

We follow Theseus on his journey as he reluctantly falls into his role as the hero of the story. Zeus and the other Gods watch the events, but are unable to interfere until the Titans are released or until the weapon is found. After the Titans are released however, the gods reappear and fuck shit up. At that point, It's all out warfare as the Gods battle the Titans, Theseus takes on Hyperion, and their respective armies battle each other. 

The Immortals is definitely a better movie than I thought it'd be. When this film first released, I figured it was going to look pretty but suck. Well it looks pretty and it's good. Admittedly, I could be influenced because I like Greek/Roman mythology, but this was a total dude movie that came in beneath the radar. I enjoyed it. Simply put, it's a visually awesome film with a clear storyline, brutality, and the super hot Freida Pinto.

Umm...Hmm...

Violence? Yes
Explosions? Yes
Nudity? Brief

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