Here We Are...Born To Be Kings...

So. What's up?
What's up? What's up?

Been a while.

Not saying I'm back, but acknowledging my absence. Life changes has derailed my posting a bit, but I'm slowly finding the time to get back into it. I have a huge art project on the agenda, and I can barely watch a movie w/o thinking, "I want to write about this, so I'll watch it later." and then I don't watch it b/c I've been too lazy to write. But I plan on putting that stuff up soon.

Anyway, I'm still intending for this to be the everything blog and I've got more content, I just have to get around to posting it. 
 

You can find me on Twitter now @EatAtCrowes.

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No More Sales

 

So, a grand total four of my designs were pulled from my Redbubble site due to DMCA/Copyright claims. The Issue with that is, if my designs are infringing, everyone's designs are infringing. I'm using the same characters as the other artists. What makes my work so much different from everyone else's?

Anyway, below is the conversation I've had with them and while I've cut both of our responses a bit short, I tried to keep them on point:

RB: We are contacting you in accordance with Redbubble's IP/Publicity Rights Policy and as a result of having received a complaint in relation to the following content...If you would like to send a counter notice please email the required information above to dmca@redbubble.com

This was the fourth notice that I have received and the third in 2 weeks. 

KC: How do I know that these are legit requests that you've received? In addition, can I see a copy of these claims that have been made against my work? Are you actively removing everything that contains the characters referenced in my work?

RB: Thank you for contacting Redbubble! This automated response is to confirm that we have received your message. 

It goes on to explain the rights of content owners and seller according to the DMCA (Digital Millennium Copyright Act) being that a "bona fide rights owner or licensee" can make a claim against a work but must provide "information" proving that they represent who they say they represent. As a seller, we're allowed to counterclaim as parody or fair use and we have a legal right to sell.

KC: I'd like to know who can answer my questions and who specifically are making these claims.

RB: Hi, there. Thanks for being a valued member of our artist community. Redbubble has moderated the content in accordance with the DMCA as it was named in a complaint from the WWE...We have a legal obligation to act on reports filed in accordance with our IP/Publicity Rights Policy where content is specifically named. If you believe this report was in error or should not apply to your work...

KC: And who made the claim to the [other three designs]? Can you see why I may be upset? I understand your position, but considering the copious amounts of similar designs (which may or may not use the same characters) that are still being offered for sale, I'm beginning to feel as if I'm being unjustly targeted.

In the end, I've decided It isn't worth the hassle and I've cancelled my account. You don't have to respond to this email, but you should consider having some plan in place in case it's determined that these notices are false as some have proven to be.

Thanks again.

-----------------------------------------


So, effective Immediately, I will no longer be selling my designs on the Redbubble website. I'll keep posting designs to the blog, but until I find some other way to get them printed, you'll only be able to aadmire them from afar. I'd apologize for any inconvenience, but none of you were shopping for my designs anyway.


The WWE has been known to hit people regarding their "property." So I'm not too upset about the Emma shirt. The information I was looking for came after I had already closed the account. 
 
Here are the Four designs that were pulled:

 

 

 

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The Crowe's Nest

"A crow's nest is a structure in the upper part of the main mast of a ship or a structure that is used as a lookout point." -Wikipedia

I'm intending for the Crowe's Nest to be the look out point for nearly everything I do/post online. We all have to get started somewhere and I figure it's time to bring everything under one umbrella. At some point I will have all of my content in this here blog. You won't even notice, but it'll happen. You can't fight it. I also realize that no one is reading this or even viewing the blog, so I can say and do whatever in this space, but I won't. Being reckless just for the sake of being reckless is how people catch a case later on in life.


So if you see some shit here that isn't a movie review or a design, don't be alarmed. It was the plan all along. Honestly, I should have written up something like this sooner, like when I changed the blog name for example, but whatever. I've never claimed to be a smart guy, only a lazy one.

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TMNT Collector's Edition (2009)

*****Flix's Picks 500th Post******

So I bought the TMNT 25th anniversary collection on Blu-Ray. For weeks I was looking at this collection, yet I couldn't commit to buying it.

 

Look at it. It's a pizza box, the discs are eaten pizzas (specifically their faves, including mushroom and anchovy), a beanie and two comics. Why would anyone hesitate to pick up this awesome set?

Simple. Included in this set was Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3: Turtles in Time. A movie so bad that it took nearly 20 years to wash the taste from our mouths. TMNT 3 was the first time in my life, that I felt someone unzip, drop their trousers, and shit on my childhood.

So understandably, I grappled with the issue of whether or not to buy this set. For about a week I went back to the video store. I winked at the set, flirted a bit. But TMNT 3 was such a huge cop block*, that I never committed. Then I rationalized it using the Collectors Set guidelines I previously posted.

With a 3:1 good film to bad film ratio, the purchase is worth it. 4 turtle films + extras and only one is trash. 

So, if you can catch this on sale, pick it up. Not only will you get the four turtles movies on blu-ray, it includes a hat, a signed sketch, and trading cards. Plus, as a friend explained to me, you can always dump turtles in time or use it as a coaster and replace it with Turtles Forever. Which would really make your collection complete. Because Fuck Turtles in Time!

An alternative plan, as explained to me by one of my good friends that also hates TMNT 3, is to "buy the TMNT box set, get a copy of the greatest TMNT movie of all time [Turtles Forerver, for those keeping score at home] insert that into the collection and use TMNT 3 as a coaster or frisbee, or skeet shoot it. If we ignore it long enough, maybe it'll go away."

 You can read more of his opinions here.



*Cop = To buy

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Bullying in Cinema

As present then, as it is now, there will never be a greater threat to the nerd kingdom than bullies. At the time, it was an undeniable way of life. Unfortunately, the crackdown on bullying has made its way to cinema as studio heads are wary of including it due to potential backlash from parents.

But why should that affect cinema? Hollywood is clearly a fantasy world where anything can happen. So why do we need to cut out bullying? Comeuppance was always had and at the end of those films, there was always victory for the nerds. Its clear, that the best way to deal with a bully is stand up to him/her and Hollywood stayed with that winning formula for many years. Now, however, that just doesn't seem possible with the muzzle that's been placed on bullying in Hollywood. That, is what I take issue with.

Everyone agrees that children need to be protected, but everyone is so concerned about "protecting" them, that they've turned them into pussies and they've made it seem that nothing is safe. Everything that exists is either out to get them or warp them in some way. That shit has to stop.

We go to movies to escape reality, but they can also be inspirational. It is true that some children are impressionable and maybe some kid watches a movie and relates to one of the nerds and by the end of the
movie, he finds his own self-confidence. Or let's say a bully watches the same flick and decides to change his ways. That shit worked for the bullying flicks of the 80s and 90s. Why wouldn't it work now?

In Conclusion, Is bullying bad? Yes.
Should we crack down on bullying? Sure, why not? Then why should it be shown on TV and Movies?

Four reasons:
1- TV and Movies are fantasies. If you or your kid can't tell the difference between fantasy and reality, you don't need to watch, you need to read.
2- If you don't like what you see, don't watch.
3- The nerd usually wins and the bully leaves humiliated.
4- Sometimes, that shit is fundamental to a good story.



 Thoughts?

Also: Check out my list of Film's Greatest Bullies, (Featured Posts) assuming it hasn't been taken down by the time this was posted. 

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Does Laurence Fishburne Hold in his Farts?

If you'll indulge me for a moment, I noticed something during my viewing of Man of Steel. Everytime Laurence Fishburne was on screen, he looked like he was struggling to contain a fart. Maybe this was a product of High Definition, but what if it wasn't? What if this is normal and just something that we've never noticed?

I put on my Anderson Cooper mask and set out to investigate by checking out some of his other films.

Looking a his filmography, he has about 90+ films to his credit. Because I can, I'm going to start from 1991.  If I can find... let's say...8 instances in what are arguably his most well known films, I will have proven my theory.



1) Boyz n the Hood

 

2) Deep Cover

3) What's Love Got to Do with It

4) Searching for Bobby Fischer

5) Higher Learning

6) Othello

7) Fled

8) Event Horizon

9) Hoodlum

10) The Matrix

11) Biker Boyz (Yes, Biker Boyz!)

12) The Matrix Reloaded

13) Mystic River

14) The Matrix Revolutions

15) Assault on Precinct 13

16) Akeelah and the Bee

17) Mission: Impossible III

18) 21

19) Predators

 
20) Contagion

21) Man of Steel

So where do we stand? There are 21 movies listed above. My goal was to hit eight. I think I've surpassed that. Shit, some of these pics look like he's already had that sweet sweet release. (I'm looking at you Hoodlum!) Specifically for this post, I'm going with 8, 11, 12, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19 and... 20. With that one, Laurence Fishburne is now officially the Martin Luther King of Suppression.

You've read my hypothesis. 

You've seen the evidence. 

What do you think?

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The World In Film

If you really look closely, you'll see that I've reviewed a lot of foreign (International/Non-American) films. There's a whole world out there and America does not have the monopoly on entertainment it once had. With impressively less budgets, and half the flair, other countries have been producing amazing films. Films deemed good enough for us to remake them and call them our own. [Because 'Murica!]

With that being said, if you have an interest in foreign movies, (or even if you don't) you might want to give these a shot. At the very least, they're definitely decent films.

Australia: 

• The Horseman (2008) - Christian, a divorced father and white collar businessman grieves over the complicated death of his daughter. When a video arrives anonymously in the mail, featuring his daughter heavily intoxicated and mistreated, Christian sets out on a reckless journey to find answers.

Brazil:

• Elite Squad [Tropa de Elite] (2007) - Captain Nascimento has to find a substitute for his occupation while trying to take down drug dealers and criminals before the Pope comes to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.
• City of God [Cidade de Deus] (2002) - Two boys growing up in a violent neighborhood of Rio de Janeiro take different paths: one becomes a photographer, the other a drug dealer.

Canada:

• The People I've Slept With (2009) - A promiscuous woman who finds herself with an unplanned pregnancy and needs to figure out who the baby daddy is...NOW.
• Pontypool (2008) - A psychological thriller in which a deadly virus infects a small Ontario town. 
• Goon (2011) - Labeled an outcast by his brainy family, a bouncer overcomes long odds to lead a team of under performing misfits to semi-pro hockey glory, beating the crap out of everything that stands in his way.

Chile:

• Mandrill (2009) - Antonio's parents were murdered when he was a child. As an adult, he is transformed into a relentless bounty hunter, code-named "Mandrill," with the sole aim of finding the murderer and avenging his parents.
• Mirageman (2007) - The raw story of a real-life superhero.

China:

• Ip Man (2008) - A semi-biographical account of Yip Man, the first martial arts master to teach the Chinese martial art of Wing Chun.
• Detective Dee (2010) - An exiled detective is recruited to solve a series of mysterious deaths that threaten to delay the inauguration of Empress Wu.
• Fearless (2006) - This film tells the story of Chinese Martial Arts Master Huo Yuanjia, the founder and spiritual guru of the Jin Wu Sports Federation.

Dominican Republic:

• La Soga (2009) - A cop works against his country's corrupt government in order to find justice on a case.

Finland:

• Iron Sky (2012) - The Nazis set up a secret base on the dark side of the moon in 1945 where they hide out and plan to return to power in 2018.

France:

• District B13 [Banlieue 13] (2004) - Set in the ghettos of Paris in 2010, an undercover cop and ex-thug try to infiltrate a gang in order to defuse a neutron bomb.

Germany:

• The Wave [Die Welle] (2008) - A high school teacher's unusual experiment to demonstrate to his students what life is like under a dictatorship spins horribly out of control when he forms a social unit with a life of its own.
• Perfume: The Story of a Murderer (2006) - Jean-Baptiste Grenouille, born with a superior olfactory sense, creates the world's finest perfume. His work, however, takes a dark turn as he searches for the ultimate scent.

Hong Kong:

• Hard Boiled [Lat sau san taam] (1992) - A tough-as-nails cop teams up with an undercover agent to shut down a sinister mobster and his crew.
• FullTime Killer [Chuen jik sat sau] (2001) - Two very different hitmen find themselves to be in each other's way. They use all their skill to solve the problem.

India:

• Delhi Belly (2011) - Three struggling room-mates unknowingly become potential prey of a ruthless gangster.
• Singham (2011) - A humiliated gangster uses his influence and goon power to terrorize a newly transferred police officer.

Indonesia:

• The Raid: Redemption [Serbuan maut] (2011) - A SWAT team becomes trapped in a tenement run by a ruthless mobster and his army of killers and thugs.

Jamaica:

• Shottas (2002) - This movie is about crime connected to selling drugs and extortion, hence the title. The crimes which start off in Jamaica then move to USA.

Japan:

• Battle Royale [Batoru rowaiaru] (2000) - In the future, the Japanese government captures a class of ninth-grade students and forces them to kill each other under the revolutionary "Battle Royale" act.
• Ichi the Killer [Koroshiya 1] (2001) - As sadomasochistic yakuza enforcer Kakihara searches for his missing boss he comes across Ichi, a repressed and psychotic killer who may be able to inflict levels of pain that Kakihara has only dreamed of.
• The Blind Swordsman: Zatoichi [Zatôichi] (2003) - The blind masseur/swordsman comes to a town in control of warring gangs, and while bunking with a farming family, he meets two women with their own agenda. 

Korea (South):

• The Host [Gwoemul] (2006) - A monster emerges from Seoul's Han River and focuses its attention on attacking people. One victim's loving family does what it can to rescue her from its clutches.
• The Man from Nowhere [Ajeossi] (2010) - A quiet pawnshop keeper with a violent past takes on a drug- and organ trafficking ring in hope of saving the child who is his only friend. 

Mexico:

• A Day Without A Mexican (2004) - When a mysterious fog surrounds the boundaries of California, there is a communication breakdown and all the Mexicans disappear, affecting the economy and the state stops working missing the Mexican workers and dwellers.

Netherlands:

• Saint [Sint] (2006) - A horror film that depicts St. Nicholas as a murderous bishop who kidnaps and murders children when there is a full moon on December 5.

New Zealand:

• Black Sheep (2006) - An experiment in genetic engineering turns harmless sheep into blood-thirsty killers that terrorize a sprawling New Zealand farm.

Norway:

• Dead Snow [Død snø] (2009) - A ski vacation turns horrific for a group of medical students, as they find themselves confronted by an unimaginable menace: Nazi zombies.

Russia:

• Nightwatch [Nochnoy Dozor] (2004) - A fantasy-thriller set in present-day Moscow where the respective forces that control daytime and nighttime do battle.

Spain:

• REC (2007) - A television reporter and cameraman follow emergency workers into a dark apartment building and are quickly locked inside with something terrifying.
• Intact [Intacto] (2001) - An enigmatic tale of four people whose lives are intertwined by destiny are subject to the laws of fate. They discover that luck is something they cannot afford to be without as they gamble with the highest stakes possible in a deadly game from which only one of them will emerge intact.
• The Devil's Backbone [El espinazo del diablo] (2001) - After Carlos, a 12-year-old whose father has died in the Spanish Civil War, arrives at an ominous boy's orphanage he discovers the school is haunted and has many dark secrets that he must uncover.
• The Orphanage [El Orfanato] (2007) - A woman brings her family back to her childhood home, where she opens an orphanage for handicapped children. Before long, her son starts to communicate with an invisible new friend.

Sweeden:

• Let The Right One In [Låt den rätte komma in] (2008) - Oskar, an overlooked and bullied boy, finds love and revenge through Eli, a beautiful but peculiar girl who turns out to be a vampire.

Thailand:

• Chocolate (2008) - An autistic girl with powerful martial art skills looks to settle her ailing mother's debts by seeking out the ruthless gangs that owe her family money.

The United Kingdom:

• Dorian Gray (2009) - A corrupt young man somehow keeps his youthful beauty eternally, but a special painting gradually reveals his inner ugliness to all. 
• Triangle (2009) - The story revolves around the passengers of a yachting trip in the Atlantic Ocean who, when struck by mysterious weather conditions, jump to another ship only to experience greater havoc on the open seas. 

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Site Update

I'm changing the rating system. Going forward, I'm going to use the Five Star System. Why the change? I'm lazy and trying to determine number scores kinda sucks. I'm all about making my life easier when I can.

So here is the new Ratings Breakdown:

1 Star = An absolute suck fest, like a two hour Lemon Party. Inspires instant hatred.

2 Stars = Sucks less than one star films, but doesn't cause rage.

3 Stars = Average. Could be better, could be worse. (I predict I'll be raining threes like Jesus Shuttlesworth.)

4 Stars = Should be five, but there's something missing or there's something in general that takes away from the film in some way.

5 Stars = An instant recommendation. If there is anything wrong with this film, it doesn't take away from how awesome it is.

**Notes** 
-There are no "Half-Stars." Scores will be rounded down instead.
-I'm keeping The Matrix rule for scoring intact i.e. any film older than 1999 will not be rated.
-TV shows may be featured, promoted and or recommended but not rated.


Well that's it for now. I guess. I feel like I need a catchphrase to sign off to, but whatever.

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Site Update

On the suggestion of a coworker (not to mention with a little competitive prodding on her part), I've recently joined icheckmovies.com and I figure it would be a good thing to integrate it into this blog. For those unaware, icheckmovies is an online database which allows you to keep track of every movie and or TV show you've ever seen. They have official lists of certain movies and you can earn awards for completing a list. (It should be known that I have problems with "greatest movies" lists. The bulk of the films on them are crap because people like crap. The others are just too old, but I figure this should be fun. I've always wanted to know how many movies I've seen.)

Going forward, I do not aim to go out of my way to watch any of the "most liked" films but if I come across them, I'll watch and, indicate that it's a listed movie in the review. I figure this should (at the least) offer some diversity to the site and give you guys a break from all the crappy B-Movies I've subjected you to over the past two years.

You can catch me on there as MoviEALD.

*you can read her stuff over here. There are some good day in the life stuff and observations, and above all else, it is entertaining.

Go. Go now!

Oh, expect a site redesign sometime in the near future. 

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Its Official: HOLLYWOOD out of Ideas!!!!

In a move that shocked absolutely no one, Hollywood has announced that they have officially run out of ideas. Just about every concept has either been done or beaten to the ground. "Yeah man, Vampires, Zombies, Rom-Coms, we've done them all," said our insider. "Every time we try something 'different' it fails. The retreads makes us money and we'd be stupid to fuck with a winning formula."

"Actually, we ran out of ideas a few years back. We've been putting out absolute bullshit for years and milking established franchises for a while now, how each have gotten #1 status is beyond us. But you chumps keep buying, so we keep making them. We've figured out the formula. The public is too simple, you don't demand much, so they don't get much. Men want explosions and titties, Women want relationship dramas and half-naked dudes, children want talking animals and bright colors. Am I oversimplifying? Yes, but the formula is simple. why change it? When you do catch on, we'll either blame piracy, make a shitty movie and market it to your kids, or create some 'new' visual like 3D and the cycle begins again. We can't lose. Yes everything has been done, but if we tweak it enough and/or add a big enough star, you'll watch. You always do."

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