Zeus is pissed that someone has stolen his lightning bolt. Since the brothers cannot steal each other's powers, he automatically believes that Poseidons son is the culprit. He gives Poseidon 14 days to return it, or he will declare war.
Percy Jackson is what he believes to be a normal high school teen who happens to suffer from dyslexia. He lives with his mom and deadbeat stepfather in an apartment in NYC.
Everything changes for him on a museum field trip. His teacher changes into a fury, his best friend is revealed as a guardian, and the tour guide was a keeper of a huge secret. Turns out that even his mother is in it. When they finally break it down for him, his mother reveals that he is a demigod. The son of Poseidon and a mortal.
Although he vehemently denies it, Everyone is after him because they have been led to believe that he has stolen Zeus' bolt. Hades kidnaps his mother and holds her for ransom. He intends to use the bolt to break out of his prison and rule Olympus. Percy basically decides "fuck that, I don't have the bolt anyway" and sets out to gain entry to hell to retrieve his mom. Along the way, he grows into his abilities, finds the bolt, the true culprit and reconciles with Poseidon.
Sean Bean as an immortal? Unfathomable.
How did I miss this movie? The Lightning Thief is a pretty darn good movie. The visual effects are dope and the comedy breaks up the ridiculousness. I'm digging how they've taken Greek Mythology and blended it with present day society. (Olympus is accessed from the empire state building, the entrance to Hades is in Hollywood California, etc) and there's a fucking Minotaur.
What I didn't like was how they had about 10 days to find the bolt and
1) Percy really didn't give a fuck about that. He was only in it to save his mom. (It basically landed in his lap)
2) they drove from NY to CA (with a stop inbetween in TN) and still had enough time left to lose 5 days in a drug induced haze.
2) they drove from NY to CA (with a stop inbetween in TN) and still had enough time left to lose 5 days in a drug induced haze.
Ridiculous.
Then they stole a Maserati (the logo is a trident) and Rosario Dawson showed up in a corset and I just about forgot my whole damn argument.
Oh. My. Zeus.
Check out the noticeables in the rest of the cast list:
Sean Bean [Immortal]
Kevin McKidd [Rome!!!]
Steve Coogan [Rock Me Sexy Jesus!]
Melina Kanakaredes
Uma Thurman [The Bride]
Pierce Brosnan [The Bond]
Catherine Keener
Joe Pantoliano [Matrix!!!]
And no one mailed in their performance. Uma Thurman killed it as Medusa.
Fuck it, I'm a sucker for Greek Mythology. Percy Jackson is the shit.
Violence? Yes
Explosions? No
Nudity? No
Explosions? No
Nudity? No
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