G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013)

 

 

The G.I. Joes are not only fighting their mortal enemy Cobra; they are forced to contend with threats from within the government that jeopardize their very existence.

Framed for crimes against the country, the G.I.Joe team is terminated by the President's order, and the surviving team members face off again Zartan, his accomplices, and the world leaders he has under his influence. Since the last film, The Cobra Commander and Destro have been captured. Storm Shadow and Zoltan have escaped and Duke now commands the team with Roadblock as his #2. 

The United States government and specifically the office of the president has been compromised. Zartan, using nano technology has been posing as the president. He intends to break out the Cobra Commander and completely wipe out the Joes. He declares them enemies of the state and gives orders to have them eliminated. After suffering heavy losses in the nighttime raid, Roadblock, Flint, Snakeyes and Lady Jay are forced to go underground to get revenge, defeat Cobra and clear their names.

Here's what I didn't like about this movie: 

• The RZA. Why does It feel like you can't have a movie, involving any type of martial art and not include him? How is he the Joe's Kung-fu Grandmaster? The RZA sucks and this is just entirely too much RZA for me.
• According to this story, Storm Shadow was set up by Zartan when he was a child. But that would make Zartan significantly older than he is in the present day. That's ridiculous.
• After the Joes rescue the President, they claim there's no casualties, yet they killed every Secret Service agent on the way to get him.
• How exactly does Storm Shadow get a hold of a snake eyes suit?
• Bruce Willis. It feels like he was included only to give the film a solid "big name."
• Also, Storm Shadow gets redemption? No. Don't change him because you felt guilty for liking him in the first. Dude is a Ninja. Good or bad, you're supposed to like him. Ninjas are dope.

Here's what I did like:

• The chemistry between The Rock and Channing Tatum is crazy. I actually kinda hope they do a buddy cop movie in the future. Their banter was hilarious.
• The Rock himself is hilarious and the dude is huge. It's ridiculous how small pistols look in his hands.
• The Action and Visual effects are crazy and within 5 min you are aware that this is already a better film than that other crap.
• Boyd Crowder is in this movie! I'm excited. He's awesome.
• Titus Pullo aka Frank Castle has a meaty role. 
• There's a "Cobra uses red lasers" reference!
• Roadblock challenging Snake Eyes as the most badass character. 
• The extended ninja sequence, because ninjas are awesome.
• Bruce Willis. He was actually kind of a beast. 
• The events of the last film are never mentioned except to introduce us to the new cast and to reintroduce the Cobra Commander, who looks fantastic and is all about the slow motion intimidating walk. (He does nothing outside of that.)

G.I. Joe: Retaliation was a fun popcorn flick. Probably could have been better overall, but I wouldn't ask for more than what I got. Definitely better than Rise of Cobra and now maybe, hopefully, we can finally throw some flour on that wet turd, scoop it up and toss it from our memories.

 

Violence? Yes
Explosions? You would have thought this was a Michael Bay film.
Nudity? No.