**So it turns out that this was a legit film. Wow. It was bad enough to convince me it was a fan remake. You can disregard this entire review. I don't feel like rewriting it.***
Tomb Raider Asencsion is an hr long attempt at a reboot of the popular Tomb Raider franchise. In this one, Lara is 17 and kinda bratty. Her father is world famous explorer, Richard Croft and he has requested that she join him in his newest dig in the Himalayas. Along the way, Her plane starts to break apart and she wakes up in a hospital about a week or three later.
At the request of her uncle, She returns to her home after her father has gone missing for three years and he's been declared dead. She does not believe he's dead and after an extended dream sequence the
film cuts to her running through the jungle, training with a military
guy in weapons and hand to hand combat. The family butler, Winston, informs her of the Mayan calendar and her father's
last mission. The Ascension Stone is said to hold the power to save the
world from the events of the Mayan apocalypse. She decides to take up
his search, hoping to both find him and succeed where literally, everyone else who has
tried has died failing.
I'm grateful for The most recent Tomb Raider game. It has successfully rebooted the franchise and was so good, it made us forget all the other Tomb Raider related shit (minus the first game). This film was pretty bad, but I've learned since then that it was a fan made remake. Keeping that in mind, I can't judge it too harshly. I can see where they wanted to go with it but seriously, no.
I know that this movie seeks to cover a lot within an hour, but seriously here's a mixed bag of things that were put to film:
- The Mayan Apocalypse is real and although we've been feeling the symptoms of our impending doom, the governments of the world have managed to convince its populations that global warming is the true culprit and there's no reason to be concerned.
- Lara walks into a, cave, trips over one rock, and finds the unfindable stone that has been lost for centuries.
- It's like they tried to make it as much like the original video game as possible. Including shit like avoiding bullets by doing several cartwheels and backflips in a row.
- There was a moment where her partner calls out to Alfred, her butler, when they've explicitly stated his name was Winston.
- They tried to dress her up like the late 90s version of the character. (Braid, shades, camouflage, etc.)
Despite the bad, (and there was a lot of that,) it was a decent film that did what it could in an hour and it did manage to mix in some humor though. That made things a little easier to swallow. It's a fan made remake, and those are pretty hit or miss. Usually miss though.
It would be unfair of me to score a fan film, so I won't. Sucks for you.
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