The Last Exorcism 2 (2013)

As Nell Sweetzer tries to build a new life after the events of the first movie, the evil force that once possessed her returns with an even more horrific plan.

 

The Cast:

• Nell, a young girl who may or may not have been possessed by the demon Abalam in the first film.
• Abalam, the demon who was in fact real.
• Miss Cleo, who appears later in the film and tries to lend a helping hand during the madness.

 

The Situation: 

Recused from the clutches of Abalam, Nell is cleaned up and starts life anew, attempting to put her past behind her. The demon Abalam, as it turns out, is very real and attempting to consume her body because she's the harbinger of his destruction. Apparently Abalam has left a piece of himself inside Nell, and in a desperate attempt to save her and the world, she undergoes yet another exorcism. As the saying goes, "You're only as good as your first."

The Resolution:

I'd be lying if I didn't tell you that shit happens, but I'd be ruining the movie if I told you exactly what went down and since I can't do spoiler tags on this blog, you're boned; Doomed to watch this dreck if you are curious. People do die though, so there's that.

Some days, I think to myself that ghost/demon sex may be the best sex of all.

The Last Exorcism 2 gained points for being a sequel that started off exactly where the first ended, but that's where it stops. Yes, the last "Last" film, ended weird and open to interpretation, and yes, I do hate that, but it was decent enough to pique my interest in the sequel. Which turned out to be a seriously lackluster film. It moved so slow and was so bad that I lost interest quickly and was just waiting for it to end. I want you to understand, the first did not set the bar super high or anything, but it was competent, at least, and told and a story. This was just flat out terrible and a waste of resources.

At least the first had the preacher. He was charismatic enough to carry it through. Nell was the sole highlight of this film. She was creepy and did a solid job maintaining tension but the nothing happening until the very end and then that shit not at all being worth the wait is what hurts the film.

I don't know what I expected, but my feelings are hurt. The only way I'd accept this film is if it was a setup to an action packed third film. But this movie was a turd and should never be mentioned again.

Violence? Yes. Eventually and even that was weak.
Explosions? Of passive aggressiveness.
Nudity? Nada. They could have at least thrown us a bone.